Movie Review: Chasers

Chasers 

Morgan Creek Productions, USA, 1994.

Sailor Eddie Devane (William McNamara) has a last day in the service of U.S. Navy. Couple of shady deals should be still completed, selling a cargo of army pants and covering the tracks together with partner-in-crime Howard (Crispin Glover). He has already ordered a Porsche from Salesman Stig (Dean Stockwell). However Eddie gets a last duty to escort a prisoner to court. There's no way to avoid the duty so he has to go on a mission with tough chief petty officer Rock Reilly (Tom Berenger) who already hates him.

Rock & Eddie

Due to technical error the prisoner they have to escort is a woman. Seductive Toni Johnson (Erika Eleniak) tries to escape on every possible occasion. Slowly the mismatched trio begins to develop fondness for each other. Nothing bonds better than little fist fighting and backstabbing.

Toni

Happily strolling on the countryside

Country music plays and quips fly. There is an amusing brief role from Gary Busey, he appears as pesky prison warden. This was the last feature film directed by Dennis Hopper, he appears here as pervy underwear salesman. Seymour Cassel appears as Master Chief Bogg.

Master Chief Bogg

Sergeant Banger

It is not very outstanding military comedy, with many ideas left half-way but has some fun scenes and is in some way entertaining. Berenger is pleasantly grumpy, Dwight Yoakam's songs and other country music are good and the story has a mild feel-good aftertaste. There is some nice southern country atmosphere with diners and roadhouses, 1970s-80s road comedies were perhaps the inspiration. There is some eye-candy for fans of William McNamara and Erika Eleniak, if you know what I mean. Still with the cast more fun could have been expected.

Rating: Average

Starring: Tom Berenger, William McNamara, Erika Eleniak, Crispin Glover, Matthew Glave, Grand L. Bush, Dean Stockwell, Bitty Schram, Gary Busey, Seymour Cassel, Frederic Forrest, Marilu Henner, Dennis Hopper, Scott Marlowe, Jim Grimshaw, Mick McGovern, Charles Page, Richard Pelzman, Laura Cathey, Jim Bath, Michael Flippo, Rick Warner, Rob Priester, Gene Dann, Jon Rodgers, Michael Martin, Victoria Duffy, Michael O'Brien, Elizabeth Hawkins, Tony Donno, Wallace Wilkinson, Robert Pentz, Jackson 'Rock' Pinckney, Jimmie Lee Sessoms, Melissa Wyler, Ted Detwiler, Bob Dorough, John Christopher Stuart, Toni Prima, David E. Harshbarger, Matthew Sullivan, Justin Thaler
Director: Dennis Hopper 

Movie Review: Lake Placid vs Anaconda

Lake Placid vs Anaconda
Curmudgeon Films, Syfy, UFO Films, USA, Bulgaria, 2015. 

Two monster reptiles from the namesake franchises clash in the death match.

Jim Bickerman (Robert Englund), who barely survived the previous sequels of "Lake Placid", helps shady scientists capture giant crocodile from Black Lake for their illegal genetic engineering project involving anacondas. The reptiles destroy the mobile laboratory and escape. Jim, security guy Beach (Stephen Billington) and couple of the scientists survive.

Jim Bickerman

Snake in a can

Beach reports back to the company's evil CEO Sarah Murdoch (Annabel Wright) who decides to get the anacondas back no matter the cost. Meanwhile Game Warden Will Tull (Corin Nemec) and Sheriff Reba (Yancy Butler) start to investigate the strange disappearances of the local folks. Tull's daughter Bethany (Skye Lourie) and other college girls travel to Clear Lake. In Clear Lake there are no crocodiles. Or that's what they think.

Will Tull

Reba

Murdoch and Beach

So the crocs start to chomp local rednecks and the girls in bikinis (tops optional), and then the giant snakes arrive to finish the meal. Can Tull save his daughter before it is too late?

Bethany (Skye Lourie) and Margo (Ali Eagle)

Amber (Sophia Lorenti) and Tiffani (Laura Dale)

Melissa (Jenny May Darcy) and Heather (Carolina Bratanova)

Syfy's horror comedy goes the usual route. Some of the jokes are dumb and fun, some miss their mark. The plus side is using the characters from the the previous films to bring some continuity (although I am more familiar with the Anaconda series than the Lake Placid series). Of the characters most are usual stock characters, some of the funniest characters are sarcastic goth Margo (Ali Eagle), and sorority leader Tiffani (Laura Dale), such a nasty woman. What is slightly disappointing is that it is more of a killer croc movie and the anacondas are almost having cameo roles. It brings nothing new to the genre but sometimes it is enough to have some cheap semi-campy monster mayhem with hot girls so in that sense the movie delivers what it promises.

Rating: Good (as a B-monster film) orBad (as a regular film)

Starring: Corin Nemec, Yancy Butler, Skye Lourie, Robert Englund, Annabel Wright, Oliver Walker, Laura Dale, Ali Eagle, Georgina Philipps, Heather Gilbert, Jenny May Darcy, Nigel Barber, Kalina Stoimenova, Carolina Bratanova, Sophia Lorenti, Vanessa Dimitrova, Deni Tsvetkova, Luke Dinchev, Anton Poriazov, David Roth, Adara Stone, Derek Morse, Velislav Pavlov, Nikolay Bakalov, Jason Small, Isaac Haig, Natasha Jane Pyne, Stephen Billington

Director: A.B. Stone

Movie Review: Beautiful Creatures (2013)

Beautiful Creatures (2013)
Alcon Entertainment, Belle Pictures, Warner Bros. Entertainment, USA, 2013. 

Based on novel by Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl. 

Smalltown boy Ethan Wate (Alden Ehrenreich) has a recurrent nightmare of following a girl and then dying. Gatlin is a boring and ultra-religious place and Ethan wants something else so he reads books to dream about faraway places. Unfortunately most books in the town are banned. He has a pretty but dull and bigoted girlfriend Emily (Zoey Deutch). New mysterous girl Lena (Alice Englert) arrives to school. Her ancestors are rumoured to be devil worshippers. When Lena's car brokes down, Ethan gives her a lift to her home. Lena recommends Charles Bukowski's books to Ethan (how charmingly decadent!). However the towners are certain that Lena's arrival means that something evil is happening. 

Ethan

Lena

Savannah (Tiffany Boone) and Emily

Ethan wants to know Lena better. Lena lives with her uncle Macon Ravenwood (Jeremy Irons) who writes books that the towners want to ban. Macon does not like that Lena is seeing a mortal boy. Also Librarian Amma (Viola Davis) warns Ethan about the girl. Weird stuff happens.

Macon

Amma

Weird stuff happens.

Actually the weird stuff is magic related, lightning storms arise, dining table turns into a merry-go-round and a cartoon-like mini-cloud rains on Ethan. Lena's family are Casters (politically correct version of witches). They also bake tasty cookies (no, really!).

Mmm. Tasty cookies

Ethan thinks it is cool (the spell casting part that is). Lena's family is not evil, but Macon's half-sister Sarafine (Emma Thompson) is. The Casters have to follow either Light or Dark path (hello Star Wars!) when they turn sixteen and a curse prevents them from freely choosing their path. Lena's cousin Ridley (Emmy Rossum) turned wicked and Lena fears that she will too. The curse can be avoided but with a heavy price.

Sarafine

Ridley

Teen fantasy film is quite entertaining with a nice touch of Southern Gothic with Civil War reenactments and shady Louisiana forests. Although it represents the same supernatural teen romance genre as "Twilight" it manages to avoid being overly sappy (although there is still plenty of teen soap opera) and it has a bit more edge with less puritanic characters than in Twilight. It has some nice literary references and encourages reading challenged books. Also there is a running joke about wrongly spelled movie titles. However it is not perfect and has some serious flaws. At some points it feels that it is making heavy short cuts and leaving something out of the book (which I haven't read). Some sideplots were suddenly abandoned and for example the book banning plot had little to do with the actual conclusion. There are numerous characters that we are getting too little information about. Who are all these people? Ridley is depicted as Siren, are the other Casters also mythological creatures? The middle point where Lena is reading a grimoire wastes too much time and the story grinds to halt. The finale was still quite interesting and the target audience of young adult fantasy stories should be happy. What is nice that the visual style looks good and acting is great. Jeremy Irons and Emma Thompson and always good and Emma Rossum was a good femme fatale. The young actors are have good chemistry and probably have shining careers in the future.

Civil War reenactment has an important role in the story.

For some reason the Finnish DVD added random Swedish words into the subtitles.

This is the last of the witch themed movie reviews for now. Next time something else.

Rating: Average

Starring: Alden Ehrenreich, Alice Englert, Jeremy Irons, Viola Davis, Emmy Rossum, Thomas Mann, Emma Thompson, Eileen Atkins, Margo Martindale, Zoey Deutch, Tiffany Boone, Rachel Brosnahan, Kyle Gallner, Pruitt Taylor Vince, Robin Skye, Randy Redd, Lance E. Nichols, Leslie Castay, Sam Gilroy, Cindy Hogan, Gwendolyn Mulamba, Cole Burden, Billy Wheelan, Christopher Darby, Bryan Adrian, Camille Balsamo, Tim Bell, John R. Bennett II, Camille Blouin, Noelle Boggio, Colby Boothman, Beau Brasseaux, Cameron M. Brown, Edward J. Clare, Lindsay Clift, Jacob Coco, Milton Crosby, Erika Erica, J.D. Evermore, Lucy Faust, Andrea Frankle, Emily D. Haley, Charles Hunt, John C. Klein, Cynthia LeBlanc, Elton LeBlanc, Ryan Chase Lee, Wanda Leigh, Ada Michelle Loridans, Jamie Mackey, Treston Miles, Jeffery Nowell, Philippe Radelet, Erin Rementer, Codie Rimmer, Annette Doucet Sharpe, Russ Skains, Kay Smith, Jim Sojka, Jordan Sudduth, Nathan Alan Thomas, Jackie Tuttle, Joseph Uzzell, Justine Wachsberger, Julia Faye West, Rachel G. Whittle, Teri Wyble 

Director: Richard LaGravenese 

Movie Review: Pawn Shop Chronicles

Pawn Shop Chronicles a.k.a Hustlers a.k.a Pawn War Chronicles a.k.a  Gangster Chronicles a.k.a Stealers

Anchor Bay Films, Mimran Schur Pictures, Suretone Pictures, 120dB Films, Upload Films, Louisiana Media Productions, Laguna Ridge Pictures, PSC Productions, USA, 2013.

I like Pawn Shop reality shows. Sometimes they have interesting trivia about historical items and are educational about value of old stuff. "Pawn Shop Chronicles" is nothing like that though but an anthology of darkly humorous crime stories.

The film's frame story is about a pawn shop in American South. In the shop Alton (Vincent D'Onofrio) and Johnson (Chi McBride) debate about having a Santa Claus in front of their shop and why there isn't black Charlie Brown. Various people come to pawn items that have some meaning to the stories. Alton is also harassed by a big black truck that appears throughout the stories.

Alton

Johnson

In the first story "The Shotgun - the Road to White Gold" redneck junkies Raw Dog (Paul Walker in his last finished role), Vernon (Lukas Haas) and Randy (Kevin Rankin) are planning to rob a meth-lab but Vernon pawns their shotgun. On the way to get guns their drug-fueled misadventures go terribly wrong.

Randy and Raw Dog

In the second story "The Ring - Caged Love" a newlywed couple comes to pawn their ring, and Richard (Matt Dillon) finds the wedding ring of his disappeared first wife. The honeymoon is canceled as Richard goes to violent quest to find her wife. The shocking truth can be found in the farm of Johnny Shaw (Elijah Wood in another disturbing role).

Richard needs information

In the third story "The Medallion - Split Ends at the Cross Roads" a lousy Elvis impersonator Ricky (Brendan Fraser) is performing in the crazy town and sells his soul to the Devil to gain fame.

Ricky

This is a strange film. On the surface it is a "Pulp Fiction" clone with "Creepshow" style comic book introductions. On the other hand it is a grotesque John Waters style Americana morality tale about people who make wrong decisions because of anger, convenience, status or greed. The barbershop choosing scene is great and satirizes the negligibly different choices that may label you for the rest of your life. Also the shallowness of Raw Dog and Randy was proven when they discussed how they became racists only because there were good meatballs in the KKK meetings. The stories vary wildly starting with the manic first part, slipping to gorno in the second part and going to black comedy in the third part. Although the stories are tied together cleverly it begins to lose its edge and the ending lacks something to make it feel like having a point. It is somewhat entertaining, sick and funny but not quite as good as it could be. 

Rating: Good

Starring: Paul Walker, Matt Dillon, Brendan Fraser, Kevin Rankin, Vincent D'Onofrio, Norman Reedus, Chi McBride, Elijah Wood, DJ Qualls, Pell James, Lukas Haas, Sam Hennings, Ashlee Simpson, Michael Cudlitz, Thomas Jane, Matt O'Leary, Kaitlin Ferrell, Bernard Hocke, Marc Macaulay, Adam Minarovich, John Wilmot, Carl Anthony Nespoli, Jeff Brockton, Detroit Brooks, Michael Papajohn, Patrick Weathers, Juli Erickson, Ouida White, Shanna Marie Burris, Nicole Lovince, Carmen Barika, Grant James, Mark Povinelli, Amy Brassette, Jack Adosta, Jimmy Lee Jr., Rachelle Lefevre, Jackie Bridges, Stephanie Preston, Steffie Grote, Dayna Smith, Gaella Forget, Bailey Ancona, Angela Schever, Codie Rimmer, Anna Hurst, Fallon Hover, Mckenzie Ortego, Donna Gaillot, Angela Pukett, Jen Leblanc, Elizabeth Raigan, Claire Frederiksen, Amanda Rose Batz, Christina Joliceuor, Kim Hebert, Brandy Caine, Chris Angerdina, Camille Blouin, Alesia Burt, Joseph Randy Causin, Edward J. Clare, Alexandra Goel, Emily D. Haley, Jeffery Nowell, Katherine Jeanie Russell, Bret Slife, Seannon Stracener, Glen Warner 

Director: Wayne Kramer

Movie Review: Hot Pursuit (2015)

Hot Pursuit (2015) a.k.a Miss Bodyguard a.k.a Don't Mess with Texas
Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, New Line Cinema, Pacific Standard, Warner Bros, USA, 2015. 

Cooper (Reese Witherspoon) is a tough but goofy Texas cop who has dating problems as men are afraid of her. Her father was also a cop so trying to follow his legacy puts pressure on her. Wife of drug trial witness and former gangster Felipe Riva (Vincent Laresca) needs protection, so Cooper must escort his wife, cranky diva Daniella Riva (Sofía Vergara). When Felipe gets whacked Cooper and Daniella must hit the road and escape the killers. Dirty cops frame them also for murder so they can not trust the officials. They get a helper from nice rogue Randy (Robert Kazinsky).

Cooper

Daniella Riva

Randy

Old idea of putting a mismatched pair together sometimes works and sometimes not. In Sandra Bullock's "The Heat" the buddy comedy worked. This time it doesn't as the jokes are mostly weak. Surely Reese Witherspoon can do better than this. Sofía Vergara's spoiled Latino character was kind of annoying. However the Scarface joke was quite funny and also the running jokes about Cooper's height and Daniella's age. The plot is quite standard for the genre (Trivial Pursuit?) There is a crime and partners who first hate each other but become buddies. There's nothing wrong with the idea but the chemistry of the main characters was mainly absent due the lazily written script. Still it is not the worst kind of comedy, but mostly forgettable and formulaic.

Rating: Average

Starring: Reese Witherspoon, Sofía Vergara, Matthew Del Negro, Michael Mosley, Robert Kazinsky, Richard T. Jones, Benny Nieves, Michael Ray Escamilla, Joaquín Cosio, John Carroll Lynch, Jim Gaffigan, Mike Birbiglia, Vincent Laresca, David Jensen, Evaluna Montaner, Marcus Lyle Brown, Manolo Gonzales-Vergara, Kim Collins, Harlon Miller, Rachel Wulff, Phil Anaya, Jannette Sepwa, Joe Camp III, Kathleen Fletcher, Anne Fletcher, Oscar Gale, Jaylen Moore, Carol Sutton, Peaches Davi II, Alejandra Pérez, Fallingstar Locke, Kayla Cangiamilla, Leslie Ivette Quezada, Millarel Ormazabal, Natalie Legendre, Zachary Woodlee, Keaton Margaret-Marie Luster, Maggie Hance, Abigail James Witherspoon, Harley Graham, Noel Rathe, Precious Roberson, Bryce Romero, Josué Gutierrez, Leticia Magaña 

Director: Anne Fletcher

Movie Review: Love and a .45

Love and a .45 

Trimark Pictures, USA, 1994.

Friendly outlaw Watty Watts (Gil Bellows) and his sexy girlfriend Starlene Cheatham (Renée Zellweger) make a living by robbing convenience stores. Everything they need in the life is love and a .45. Watty has a rule of never making a robbery with a loaded gun so no one can get hurt. He has debts to mobsters so he has to make a robbery with his psychotic junkie friend Billy (Rory Cochrane). That's a bad idea as Billy snaps and shoots the cashier girl. 

Watty Watts

Starlene Cheatham

Billy Mack Black

Chased by Billy, crazy gangsters and dirty cops Watty and Starlene have to flee. Things get worse and soon the bodies start to pile up when meth-head mobsters Dinosaur Bob (Jeffrey Combs)  and Creepy Cody (Jace Alexander) join the chase. Due the true crime TV coverage Watty and Starlene become local celebrities.

Dinosaur Bob  and Creepy Cody

Made in the wake of ultraviolent crime films "Wild at Heart" "Reservoir Dogs" and "True Romance" this is not bad lower budget example of the genre. With good characters and fun dialogue it is one of the better Tarantino imitations. It is not very well known film but has become a kind of cult classic and not only because of Renée Zellweger's role as hottie Texas outlaw. This was one of Renée Zellweger's bigger roles before becoming an actor in  romantic comedies and drama movies so it is quite different film to see her in. Rockabilly and psychobilly filled soundtrack is good. The story is pleasantly sleazy white trash crime story with dark humour and entertaining dialogue. The characters are crazy and over the top. Billy is wild as insane and unpredictable criminal, a perfect nutcase. Road movie crime film veteran Peter Fonda appears as Starlenes crippled hippie dad Vergil and 'Re-animator' Jeffrey Combs as mob enforcer Dinosaur Bob who sticks to his old habits and still likes to play with needles.

Peter Fonda as Vergil Cheatham

Rating: Good

Starring: Gil Bellows, Renée Zellweger, Rory Cochrane, Jeffrey Combs, Jace Alexander, Ann Wedgeworth, Peter Fonda, Tammy Le Blanc, Wiley Wiggins, Jack Nance, Charlotte Ross, Michael Bowen, Scott Roland, Todd Conner, Richard Rothenberg, Stopher Finley, Brad Leland, Augustin Solis, Kevin Berve, Reverend Horton Heat, Darin Scott, C.M. Talkington 

Director: C.M. Talkington