October Belongs to Horror #6: Dead Rising: Endgame

Dead Rising: Endgame
Legendary Digital Media, DR2 Productions, Contradiction Films, Sony Pictures Entertainment, USA, Canada, 2016.

Watching "Dead Rising: Watchtower" first is a must the plot will be difficult to grasp. Two years after the zombie outbreak of the first film military and pharmaceutical company Phenotrans are kidnapping people. Chase (Jesse Metcalfe) is trying to expose the conspiracy and find his former photographer Jordan (Keegan Connor Tracy) but he gets cold shoulder from his TV-channel who are afraid to publish the scoop. His workmates Sandra (Marie Avgeropoulos) and Jill (Jessica Harmon) have different opinions about continuing the crusade. Well, it is better do do something soon as naughty General Lyons (Dennis Haysbert) plans to destroy everyone who knows about the conspiracy.

Chase Carter

Sandra and Jill

Defected company scientis Hancock (Ian Tracey) tells about project Afterlife. Military plans to kill all the 1.5 million who are getting treatment for the zombie virus. Chase, Sandra, Hancock and weapons dealer Garth (Patrick Sabongui) form a team to save the infected. The clock is ticking and the heroes have to infiltrate a server farm in zombie-infested area. The zombies have previously been of the slow type, but now new genetically-altered bald-headed zombies appear, and boy are they fast. Scientist named Rand (Billy Zane) has been doing secret experiments. Jordan returns, but she is not her usual self and no wonder considering what has been done to her.

Let's go to work

Jordan

Rand

The sequel is less-like video game, the horror is a bit more effective and gorier. Still the improvised weapons are in use, but they seem more practical than the crazy gadgets of the first film. Over all the plot feels more serious, leaving less room for black comedy or cool boss fights which is a loss. Still there are good action scenes and Chase has evolved into zombie slayer who chops zombies like there is no tomorrow. The end fight is quite awesome. In the end Chuck Greene (Victor Webster) from game "Dead Rising 2" can be seen. I wouldn't be surprised if a sequel would follow, as the end leaves the plot lines hanging.

Chuck Greene

Rating: Good

Starring: Jesse Metcalfe, Marie Avgeropoulos, Ian Tracey, Keegan Connor Tracy, Jessica Harmon, Patrick Sabongui, Camille Sullivan, Jim Thorburn, Billy Zane, Dennis Haysbert, Teach Grant, Lee Majdoub, Sandy Robson, Donavon Stinson, Peter Kelamis, Ben Cotton, Viv Leacock, Luvia Petersen, Stephen Lobo, Dakota Guppy, Curtis Lum, Heather Roop, Jim Shield, Victor Webster, Sarah Lindsay, Joshua Roy, Peter Brown, Naomi Kyle

Director: Pat Williams

October Belongs to Horror #5: Dead Rising: Watchtower

Dead Rising: Watchtower
Legendary Digital Media, Contradiction Films, Di Bonaventura Pictures, Dead Rising Productions, USA, Canada, 2015.

Based on Capcom's video game series.

Reporter Chase Carter (Jesse Metcalfe) is making a scoop about zombie epidemic with photographer Jordan (Keegan Connor Tracy). The infected must use Zombrex-medicine once a day to avoid being turned into zombies. But the drug stops working and soon the street are full of hungry monsters. 

Chase Carter

Jordan

The army starts firebombing the city after time limit is reached. The survivor celebrity of the previous outbreak Frank West (Rob Riggle) comments the happenings in his bluntly realistic style so that the interviewer rolls her eyes. As a comical relief, Frank is a bit like Bruce Campbell's Ash. Jordan's side mission is to seek allies outside the quarantine area to help Chase get out. The goverment officials General Lyons (Dennis Haysbert) and Norton (Gary Jones) have their orders, but can either of them be trusted?

Frank West

General Lyons and Norton

Chase joins forces with Crystal (Meghan Ory) who has her own supply of Zombrex that works. There is a sinister conspiracy behind the recent outbreak. A bit of tragedy is brought by Maggie (Virginia Madsen) who is searching for her lost daughter. It will not end well...

Crystal

Maggie and the other heroes assess the situation

The story goes on with familiar structure of video games. There are occasional boss fights and improvised weapons such as power tools attached to mallets, chainsaws and shovel-swords. The highlights include fights against Bonzo the Zombie Clown (C. Ernst Harth) and psychotic biker gang leader Logan (Aleks Paunovic).

Logan

Bonzo the Zombie Clown

These are useful for cutting down zombies

As a video game movie this is faithful to the world of the original games, satisfying the video game fans. There is not much new added to the genre but otherwise the story is passable. Over the top zombie mayhem is good although sometimes also quite tasteless even for considering the zombie topic. The action has some well designed scenes such as long one-shot scene where Chase escapes zombies climbing over cars and a school bus. Also the combo weapons are wacky and inventive. Entertaining stuff although the almost two-hour duration could have been condensed. The cast has familiar faces from TV shows, pretty co-stars and Jesse Metcalfe fits the role of hotshot reporter hero. The movie ends in a way that sequel is inevitable.

Rating: Good

Starring: Jesse Metcalfe, Meghan Ory, Virginia Madsen, Keegan Connor Tracy, Aleks Paunovic, Dennis Haysbert, Gary Jones, Carrie Genzel, Rob Riggle, Reese Alexander, Harley Morenstein, Julia Benson, Peter Benson, Darren Dolynski, Patrick Sabongui, Travis MacDonald, Michael Bean, Sachin Sahel, Khaira Ledeyo, James Yi, Colton Quan, Manny Jacinto, David Lyle, Gaston Morrison, Todd Thomson, C. Ernst Harth, Taya Clyne, Nickolas Baric, Ed Brando, Paul Lazenby, Jen Soska, Sylvia Soska, Mark Wilmot 

Director: Zach Lipovsky

October Belongs to Horror #3: Army of Zombies (Kuutamosonaatti II: Kadunlakaisijat)

Army of Zombies (Kuutamosonaatti II: Kadunlakaisijat)
Filminor, Finland, 1991.

...And in Germany this is known as "Muttertag 3."

The first film "Kuutamosonaatti" was darkly fun agrarian horror cult film. Sadly the sequel loses the horror momentum and the result is a confusing mess.

Most of the Kyyrölä family died in the first film. Mother froze to death and Arvo burned to crisp. Only animal-like giant Sulo (Mikko Kivinen) remained. Sulo takes the remains of his family to a sauna, because if a good sauna won't help then nothing will. And so Mother (Soli Labbart) and pervy brother Arvo (Kari Sorvali) revive. Arvo is more slack-jawed than before (his jawbone falls several times), but that will heal over time. They can also revive Father Kyyrölä (Erkki Pajala) who drowned into swamp when he was smuggling moonshine. 

Sulo

Arvo

It is time for Arvo to go find a job in Helsinki. Nosy social workers come to the farm so the Kyyrölä's sink them into swamp. There is some recession era satire when Arvo tries several jobs. In Helsinki Arvo gets a job entertaining Russian tourists. A better job opens up as driver of street sweeping machine (therefore justifying the Finnish name of the movie: "Street Sweepers." Finally he starts living by selling moonshine. Beautiful singer Kata Kärkkäinen (former Playboy-model and nowadays writer, artist and media-persona) catches Arvo's eye this time, but compared to the first film the threat is mild. 

Arvo's bachelor pad

Kata Kärkkäinen

Mother Kyyrölä gets worried that Arvo is living a sinful life in the city. So Mother and Sulo have to find Arvo and put him under control As a funny detail everyone in Helsinki seems to originate from Kyyrölä-village (satirizing the movement of country people to the cities). On the way to find Arvo, the Kyyrölä's meet yuppies, inept cops and social workers who all look like Finnish actor Matti Pellonpää. So far so good. Even as the horror aspect was lost, there could have been some funny contrast to the first film when the hellbillies moved into big city.

Matti Tuominen as the leader of Red Guard zombies

Matti Pellonpää as social worker

But the focus shifts and it is difficult to say what the makers had in mind. Father Kyyrölä revives a squad of Red Guard soldiers who were executed during the Civil War. With their leader Edward Allan Kilpinen (Matti Tuominen) the zombie communists travel to Helsinki to continue the revolution. Bumbling around, they meet various people including the Minister of Culture (Miitta Sorvali, who is Kari Sorvali's comedian wife).

Minister of Culture (Miitta Sorvali)

And so on. Kyyrölä brothers sell hazardous moonshine, and cause a ruckus in Miss Helsinki contest (hosted by era's popular game show host Jorma Pulkkinen), chase Kata in amusement park Linnanmäki and escape cops. But the film is basically plotless and the story goes nowhere. Arvo still has some funny one-liners but everything is watered down. It is still recommended to watch once to see the further adventures of the Kyyröläs. However the experience is quite painful.

Jorma Pulkkinen

Finnish Ramopunk band 'Ne Luumäet' made a song inspired by the film with the chorus: "'You shouldn't stare too much at the street sweeper. He comes and kills. And when he kills, then you die.'

Rating: Bad

Starring: Soli Labbart, Kari Sorvali, Mikko Kivinen, Erkki Pajala, Keijo Komppa, Matti Tuominen, Ilkka Koivula, Esa Anttila, Seppo Juusonen, Jussi Tuominen, Katariina Souri, Mikko Nousiainen, Vesa Vierikko, Leena Rapola, Veli Tuomas-Kettunen, Olavi Tervahartiala, Veikko Tiitinen, Jouko Klemettilä, Matti Pellonpää, Juha Häkkänen, Toivo Tuomainen, Martti Kuisma, Anne Nielsen, Aulis Hämäläinen, Pentti Louko, Tauno Karvonen, Miitta Sorvali, Ulla Tapaninen, Jari Järvimaa, Jorma Pulkkinen, Sari Havas, Risto Aaltonen, Harri Hyttinen, Lina Ignatova, Pirjo Kotimäki, Sonja Lindén, Marjo Louhe, Pia Nolvi, Anne Pakkanen, Albena Petrova, Ranja Rannikko, Anne Styrman, Satu Tuuliluoto, Minna Aaltonen
Director: Olli Soinio

October Belongs to Horror #1: Dead Before Dawn (2012)

Dead Before Dawn (2012) a.k.a Dead Before Dawn 3D
WANGO Films, Canada, 2012.

Halloween is near, so it is time to watch horror films. Finnish blogger ...noir challenged bloggers to watch eight horror films during October, so October Belongs to Horror (Lokakuu kuuluu kauhulle).

My first choice is a Canadian indie horror comedy. 

Casper Galloway (Devon Bostick, known for "Diary of a Wimpy Kid") is a clumsy college kid. He goes to help his Grandpa Horus (Christopher Lloyd) to take care of occult shop. His friends come shopping and an ancient demon is freed. Bit like "Ghostbusters" they have to select the form of pestilence, so they conjure up wacky rules involving idea of suicidal people turning into half demon half zombie monsters who infect the cursed by giving hickeys.

...
..
.

Right-o.

Casper Galloway

Horus

So everyone they look into eyes start killing themselves and turning into zemons. Along with Casper there are Casper's secret love interest Charlotte (Martha MacIsaac, known for "Superbad"), charmingly ditzy cheerleader  Lucy (Brittany Allen, who will appear in the next "Saw" movie "Jigsaw"), Caspers friends Dazzle (Brandon Jay McLaren) and Becky (director April Mullen), mug entrepreuner Seth (Tim Doiron who wrote the script) and Charlotte's meanie boyfriend jock Patrick (Kyle Schmid). There is a way to break the curse but the time limit is tight. If the curse is not broken before next morning they will all die. The night will be long and bloody.

Charlotte and Lucy

Dazzle, Seth and Becky

Hillbilly zemons (Max Topplin and Marty Adams)

There are so many zombie horror-comedies that it is refreshing that someone tries to have some new ideas and create eccentric characters even if they are basically stereotypes (a loser, two jocks, two cheerleaders, pothead and a tough girl). Although some of the jokes are more lame than funny, there are many moments of genuine hilarity. There was a funny way to show flashbacks and one of the character was obsessed with hotdogs. Christopher Lloyd is always good and in one scene he uttered his famous quote: "Great Scott!" As far as the action went, it was semi-gory, not showing the bloodiest kills but still there was more gore than would be expected from the Finnish age rating 12. Has the The Finnish Board of Film Classification been sloppy? Otherwise the tone was not too serious, even with some basically tragic events. But so it is usually with these zombie comedies, and this makes a fun Halloween viewing if you like dumb humour.

Lucy's weapon of choice

Seth's new friend (Kent Churly) comes to visit

This was the first Canadian 3D film. I do not believe that I missed anything by watching the 2D version. Couple of CGI-explosions looked awful, otherwise the effects were okay for the budget. As the actors had a lot of experience of films and TV-shows, the acting was good (although comically ver the top) and the actors were clearly having fun.

Rating: Good

Starring: Devon Bostick, Martha MacIsaac, Christopher Lloyd, Brandon Jay McLaren, Brittany Allen, Kyle Schmid, Tim Doiron, April Mullen, Kevin McDonald, Ellen Dubin, Rossif Sutherland, Dru Viergever, Benjamin Ayres, Max Topplin, Marty Adams, Jacob Ewaniuk, Boyd Banks, Melissa Jane Shaw, Michael Xavier, Meg Walter, Melanie Mullen, Mickey Moon, Tammy Young, Kent Churly, Kevin Jennings, Jack Benard, Byron Abalos, Chris Baker, Adam Buller, Luke Higginson, John Benard, Darryl Doiron, Nicholas Spencer Murray, Daniel M. Veldman

Director: April Mullen

Movie Review: Sinbad of the Seven Seas

Sinbad of the Seven Seas

Cannon Films, USA, Italy, Iraq 1989.

Claimed to be based on Edgar Allan Poe's story "The Thousand and Second Tale of Scheherazade," but we only believe it because they say so.

Mother (Daria Nicolodi, known for Dario Argento's giallo films) reads her daughter a bedtime story about brave hero Sinbad the Sailor.

Buffed-up sailor named Sinbad (Lou Ferrigno) sails the seas with his merry men Prince Ali (Roland Wybenga), Viking (Ennio Girolami), Bald Cook (Yehuda Efroni), Chinese Soldier of Fortune Cantu (Hal Yamanouchi) and Poochie the Dwarf (Cork Hubbert). In Basra kind Caliph (Donald Hodson) rules the happy city. Princess Alina (Alessandra Martines) is awaiting for Ali. Evil Vizier Jaffar (John Steiner) wants to be caliph instead of the caliph and uses black magic to mesmerize the city making everyone mindless puppets.

Sinbad

Alina

Jaffar

So when Sinbad returns, there is nobody to welcome him. Unacceptable. Sinbad marches to the palace to see what is the problem. Jaffar throws Sinbad into dungeon and his friends have to save him but they get captured too. So Sinbad has to free himself using a rope made of snakes(!) Meanwhile Jaffar tries to corrupt the Princess and hides the magic jewels that protect the city. The Princess is tied to acrylic machine where colourful juice flows in tubes.

Sinbad's crew

Prince Ali

Tight spot

Jaffar has also ally, mercenary friend or whatever Soukra (1980s bodybuilder Teagan Clive) whose function is to sarcastically comment on Jaffar's failed attempts to destroy Sinbad. The dialogue hints that there was about to be Soukra's and Ali's duel but nothing such ever happens. In the end she is even partying with the heroes, who would have thought about that.

Jaffar and Soukra

Undead horrors, Amazons and rock monsters guard the gems. Amazon Queen Farida (Melonee Rodgers) can suck man's will away. And so the Amazon gymnasts capture the whole crew. Amazon Queen goes for the alpha male and vamps Sinbad. But once the curse is broken, the Queen is not so hot anymore. Bye!

Farida

On another island there are undead suits of armour (raising from the dead like the "Blind Dead"), jumping zombies but also eccentric Wizard Nadir (Leo Gullotta) and his nice daughter Kira (Stefania Girolami Goodwin) who gets kidnapped by hideous laser-shooting Zombie King. Jaffar is watching the show so Sinbad boasts like a pro-wrestler everytime he gets a gem. Curiously when there is a fight Sinbad always throws his scimitar away and trusts his muscles instead.

Kira

Balloon ride

I'm gonna get ya!

Enzo G. Castellari knocks off American Sinbad-films, and even taking couple of sets from Lou Ferrigno's Hercules-films. Dov Seltzer's synth-heavy soundtrack sounds typical for the Italian cinema of the 1980s but it is highly anachronistic for a peplum film.

Whereas the Hercules film tried to take the subject seriously (albeit with unintended hilarity) Sinbad does not even try. The beginning still goes on like a regular peplum, but then it goes into silly mode. Every scene with Jaffar is a riot as he delivers ham like it was Christmas coming. And the dialogue is such that the makers cannot have been serious. Of the crew Bald Cook and Poochie are the comical duo. Originally Luigi Cozzi was going to direct it but Enzo was called instead. The film was made in 1986, but shelved for three years (not a good sign) and in 1989 Cozzi was hired to save what could be saved and complete the unfinished film making the end results even more confusing. The result is an entertaining trainwreck that alternates between awesomely cheesy and so bad it is good. Although the story is childish, echoes from Italo-horror make this difficult to market as a family-oriented film.

This is an incredibly fun movie. And this film has even two Lou Ferrignos!

Rating: So bad it is good or Very good

Starring: Lou Ferrigno, John Steiner, Roland Wybenga, Ennio Girolami, Hal Yamanouchi, Yehuda Efroni, Alessandra Martines, Teagan Clive, Leo Gullotta, Stefania Girolami Goodwin , Donald Hodson, Melonee Rodgers, Cork Hubbert, Romano Puppo, Attilio Cesare Lo Pinto, Armando MacRory, Giada Cozzi, Daria Nicolodi, Ted Rusoff, Massimo Vanni

Directors: Enzo G. Castellari, Luigi Cozzi (uncredited)