Stranded (2013) a.k.a The Ark
Gloucester Place Films, International Pictures Three, Minds Eye Entertainment, Moving Pictures Media, Canada, UK, 2013.
In Moonbase ARK meteor storm destroys expensive equipment. Gerard (Christian Slater), Ava (Amy Matysio), Doctor Lance (Brendan Fehr) and Bruce (Michael Therriault) are stranded in Moon. Ava is sent to stop carbon monoxide leak. She finds a strange rock that contains spores. Ava gets infected and has an instant pregnancy. Horrible alien-baby starts to run amok in the infirmary. Or is it all just hallucination caused by CO-poisoning?
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| Gerard |
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| Lance |
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| Ava |
Next the alien takes the identity of one of the astronauts and does some bad things. Ava's quarantine leaks like a sieve. Half of the film goes to wondering if the alien monster is hallucination or a real thing. The rest of the time the crew tries ineptly to do something to stay alive.
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| Bruce |
This is a generic "Alien" and "The Thing" clone with slimy special effects. Lots of similar but more fun films were made in the 1980s or 90s. With a minimalist cast the characters should be interesting to feel some sympathy for them but as they are so generic it is hard to care about them. Props look cheap and book reading lights are used as microphones/hologram projectors. The laboratory working methods look unprofessional. Quiz question for the science oriented people: what is missing here from the micropipette? (Not to mention that the centrifuge in the scene has an unbalanced load)
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| Oh, get a tip! |
Well, it is common to have such factual errors in low-budget films but as I got bored, I began to search for similar mistakes just to stay awake.The actors do their best but the script is too weak to make them do anything interesting.
As a positive detail the moonbase exterior sets are not created using bad CGI-effects, but they are handmade and bring nostalgic memories of old "Godzilla"-style miniature models.
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| Moonbase ARK |
Oh, Roger Christian directed also "Battlefield Earth", that explains a lot.
Rating: 
Bad
Bad
Starring: Christian Slater, Amy Matysio, Michael Therriault, Brendan Fehr, Ryland Alexander, Lyndon Bray, Mark D. Claxton
Director: Roger Christian
Speaking of Battlefield Earth, I remember Conan O'Brien joking about Roger Christian and his plans to release a director's cut version of his piece of shit movie. As an empty tape... :D
ReplyDeleteHaha! Director's Ultimate Limited Total Final Extreme Cut Edition
ReplyDelete